STRENGTH AND TRUSTING YOUR GUT

(I had to include these valentines out-takes because they're my favourites. They just don't fit on paper very well...)

Here is what I've learned in the past two weeks, brought to you in lovely, short-form prose. Maybe you'll learn something from what life has taught me! 

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Art-wise
Give yourself some credit - you do the things you love, no matter how 'blocked' you are.
I made the snap-decision to apply for art school last week, and scrounged up as much of my work as I possibly could. Looking at it all stacked up, it’s actually a surprise to see how much work I’ve been doing while feeling like I’m ‘not doing anything’ artistically. Sometimes it takes a crunch to really see all the things you’ve done, and see how far you’ve come. If you’re really feeling like you’re ‘stuck’ and not creating, I highly suggest gathering up as much of your work as you can, and see it all stacked up gloriously in front of you. For once, I’m not anxious about creating, and what I’ve created!

Writing-wise
Sometimes a break is necessary
I’ve hit a point in writing my novel where I need to seriously revise and cut away at the plot. A huge change is on it’s way, and after doing this a few times, I’m well aware that this is the beginning of a good thing, but it’s also a frustrating time. Knowing you’re going to make a break through, but not knowing when it’s going to kick in your door and demand snacks is painful. So it’s been two weeks of creative floundering, toying with ideas, trying on different outfits, cleaning up, waiting. I hate waiting. But I’m hoping I’ll have the story cleaned up and defined enough that I’ll be twelve steps ahead after said breakthrough is comfortably asleep on my couch and inspiring me.

Work-wise
It’s honestly not as bad as you think.
I’ve been going in to work anxious almost every day. Between our traffic and absolutely bonkers customers, every day has been a rollercoaster, leaving me exhausted every day. And going in wearing all my armor (in case of said crazies) and already exhausted (because of the strain of thinking about how many people I’m going to see) makes for another awful day. Is my job ideal? No, not at all. Is it what I have for the moment? Yes. I might as well try and make it as enjoyable as I can, and attempt to at least go in to work and come out of work in a good mood. Hopefully I can continue to call my power and control back from work to myself, and protect myself in a way that isn’t compulsive anxiety. 

People-wise
Friends are great.
I’m a strange mix when it comes to people. I’m comfortable as an extrovert, but more often than not I default to introvert, because people tend to exhaust me. I don’t like big groups, I don’t like parties, and I’m quite comfortable going alone for long periods of time. It doesn’t help when you live with your best friend - we can literally go for weeks without really seeing anyone. Which tends to make me…anxious and grouchy. These past few weeks I’ve stepped it up, I’ve gotten in contact with friends, and I’ve dragged my little ass (and his) out of the house to see friends. Seriously - if there’s one thing that tends to calm me down, it’s games and laughs with a friend or two.

General knowledge
Holy crap, I’m actually kind of a decent person?
I always like to describe anxiety as a literal goblin sitting on your shoulder, squishing you, burping in your face, flicking boogers at you, and constantly commenting on how awful of a human being you are. Not only do I normally face down self depreciation and doubt on a daily basis, I’m literally anxious about having those anxieties confirmed by others (anxiety-inception. How sweet). I not only got HUGE compliments on my art, but I’ve hung out with people who genuinely like me, want to hang out with me, and make me laugh. And it’s felt great. I feel like I’ve got a bit of my shit together, and that feels awesome.

Also - I learned that studio art might not be what I want, and that Theatre Design sounds like a program that suits me WAY better. And I’m applying for it? And I’m excited about it? It’s crazy how life can take a 180 when you trust yourself and let it do it’s thing!

Tarot card
STRENGTH
Indicator of your own power. Lends you it's own. Tends to come up in either a time of great strength, or a time when you will need some. Powerful and straightforward. A great card to have in any spread.

Miscellaneous
Trust. Your. Gut.
I try to run my life on this rule: After this is over, what will you feel when you think back on this, and how do you want to feel? If any anxiety or regrets come up, I tend to take the course of action that will eliminate those feelings. Or at least allow me a justification for why I did what I did, when they do come up. If I feel like I need to do something, I try as hard as I can to muster up the strength to do it, and my gut almost never leads me wrong when I do.

PRINTABLE ART-HISTORY VALENTINES

Oh Valentines day, single or taken, you’re upon us once again.

Despite citing my love of the days before and after Valentines more (Galentines day, and discount chocolate day, respectively) I’ve always had a thing for Valentines - not the actual holiday, but the little paper things handed out on Valentines day. I always loved spending my days after school carefully ripping apart sheets of disney characters and cartoon heroes, dilligently writing all my classmates names on the paper, and then tucking them in to each paper ‘mailbox’ every year.

I loved opening my box, dumping all the cards out, and reading through them, even though most of them just said to: Melissa, from: Lauren. The candy didn’t hurt, either.

But as we get older, most of us don’t have long class lists to send valentines to. Or we just don’t want to send our friends frozen-themed valentines for the third year in a row. So, this year, I’ve made my own Valentines. Angry, feminist, art-history valentines (the best kind). Feel free to print off your own and share them with your friends. I’m quite proud of them, and I hope they give you and your friends as much of a laugh as they did me and mine!

You can nab the other two printable images below (just click to get the full-size images)!

Happy sharing!

BLOCK BUSTERS

Welcome to block-busters, a series where I share a bunch (a whole month's worth) of prompts to get your creativity flowing. Use these prompts to draw, to write, to create whatever on earth you feel inspired to create! And please, let me know what you make with them - I love to see!! Feel free to email, comment, or tag the posts #tmtumakes to share! 

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Describe yourself in three words or less
The wind and it’s ways
“She never told him she would stay…”
Frosted windows
Letting chocolate melt inside your mouth
A love spell
“I never thought I’d see you again”
Decribe as many kinds of snow as you can
A drop of water clung to his lips as he drank
Her eyes held his for just a second more than was comfortable
There was something strange about her
The softest of blankets
Golden tattoos
The feeling of your fingers thawing
You found a wallet. What’s inside of it?
Describe the best and worst friends you’ve ever had
What’s been lost to the past
An ancient love story
He ran his hands over the initials carved there years ago…
A bouquet of flowers
An apology
The first feeling of spring
Describe 10 different memories of water
6 sunsets
The best dessert you’ve ever eaten.
“He wasn’t what I expected him to be.”
A broken machine
Every kind of weather seemed to be happening all at once
She yawned, her head slumped against her hand.
Imaginary constellations
A list of plants I’ve killed.

I hope you enjoyed this month's posts. Happy creating, and don't forget to share/tag your work - I can't wait to see what you make!

CREATIVE THURSDAY v.1 BIRD WALLS AND PORTFOLIOS

 Welcome to creative update - a post series where I share all the creative trouble I've been up to for the past few weeks. There will be pictures. There will be whining. There will be (hopefully) a bit of inspiration and a bit of a peek in to my process!

Images inspiring me: 
the above gorgeous, dreamy photos of Belarus by Alex Ugalnikov.

And of course, the image of times square that looks magically like an impressionist painting, by Michele Palazzo. I’m in love with accidentally classic photographs (anyone remember that parliamentary fight-scene photo that turned out to fit the golden ratio perfectly? Because I do, and I still love it)

What I've been writing:
Work has been a bit slow on the novel since mid-january. I'm going through a period of revision and re-thinking that tends to take away from the writing. I'm thinking a lot about my novel, and hopefully getting a clearer picture of what I want it to be about, who my characters are, and what on earth is happening in the giant mountain I'm determined to set it in. I did get a bit of writing in, though, so here's a little peek at some rough-work:

     Maeva didn’t know which fact she hated more - being born a girl in the mountains, or being born a girl to the Orvellan family. She wondered if Yuliya had struggled with the same things as she did - the steady, unsettling itch of being watched constantly. Being appraised, constantly. She wondered if men dared to gaze upon the prophet’s glowing form as she led the clans through the unending wastes. She wondered if men dared question her as she pushed open the golden gates to the paradise that had become their homeland. She wondered if anyone inturrupted her, swiped at her, laughed at her, mocked her. She wondered if the prophet had to contend with marriage proposals, if her followers would threaten to disregard her orders unless she married.


    And then she would shake the thoughts out of her head - those were the kinds of thoughts that got her in to trouble. Maybe that’s why she’d been born a girl to her pious family of men - too many blasphemous thoughts of a human prophet, all collected in to one tiny human. But it always stuck - the image of the prophet, her long black hair rippling out of it’s braid, messy and dark like liquid night, desperation and tears prickling at the corners of her eyes. Her form rising and falling with each breath, until she raised her head and looked directly at Maeva - every single emotion on her face hitting Maeva like a knife to the gut. It felt so human, so real. Even awake, the image haunted Maeva, fluttering in the back of her mind, haunting her.

 Here's my desk for right now: A huge mess, as always. I've started painting a colour every day, and putting them in my bullet journal at the end of the week. It's a great way to sort of gauge my week - it says quite a bit about the days I've had. I've been reading a LOT of comics lately. Like...I've done about three years worth of comics reading in the past week. I'm really hoping it will filter in to my work - it's some rad, inspiring stuff. I'll talk about it more next week. 

What I've been Doing
I got to see a lot of friends these past few weeks, which is a great boost for morale. Honestly, sometimes you don't realize how long it's been since you've seen someone else until you're incredibly desperate. So it's been a real treat. I've also been slowly plunking away at my February goals. 

It's been a bit of a slow week for my sketchbook/bullet journal, I always find that work screws with the systems I've set up (something I'm trying to figure out and fix). Here's a page that popped up over the week that I'm quite proud of. Sometimes just using a page to sketch can be really, really nice.

Music I’m listening to
This incredibly calm and warm playlist, perfect for a quiet winter night of creating
This awesome playlist for writing badass characters, inspired by Slytherin, to boot.
And finally, this great mix of female vocals, for creating when you're feeling a little less confident than normal

Art I've been Making
It has been a great week creatively! I decided to start to get together my portfolio, with a lot of pleasant surprises. I've actually made a lot of art I'm quite proud of, which has been a relief! I've started on a new project in the hopes of improving my ability to paint landscapes. They're not going to be masterpieces, but I'm hoping I can capture mood/colour/location details quickly and accurately. I'm quite proud of the first one. 

I also bit the bullet and made a gallery wall in the apartment this week. It involved a lot of swearing, a lot of improvising and a bunch of birds. The results are fantastic and I'm in love. If you're looking for an easy way to update your apartment, with only a small amount of fussing, I highly suggest making a gallery wall.

A small challenge:
In light of my home-decorating success, here's a small challenge for you: 

your space: claim a small space of your home in some way. It can be big or small (the more you see/use it, the better). Clean it up, wash it from top to bottom, try and filter out all the dust and negativity that may have collected there. Now, add something that makes you happy - it can be a little collection of items you find inspiring, it could be a picture (or 12), it could be a comfy chair, a coat of paint, some soft fabric and pillows. It could simply be a new way of organizing something. Try and make an area of your house more pleasing and more in-tune to you. Bring some good energy in as spring comes around.

What’s in store next:
These next few weeks, I have a lot of project-making to do. I'm planning on making hilarious valentines cards this week (hence the dancing...harpies? Maybe? Classical art is the. Best), and hopefully sharing them here. I'm still going to be plugging away at my portfolio, making a few small projects to fill and round it out, and I'm also hoping I can get back in to the swing of my bullet journal. 

I'm excited! We'll see what the next few weeks hold, and I'll have another great update for you then! 
Until next time - keep making awesome things! 

HELLO FEBRUARY AND GOALS

(image source)

Hello February!

Hello to everything slowly waking up. Hello to long, yawning mornings and the return of golden daylight. Hello to the smell of water on the wind and the feeling of warmth on my skin, if only the smallest touch. Hello to melting chocolate, warm pink hearts and opening letters, to licking envelopes, rainy grey skies and maybe, just maybe the promise of spring.

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January was a quiet month for me - something that I needed to start the year off. It mostly involved testing out a bunch of things I wanted to do; with varying degrees of success. I think that giving myself a month to ‘screw up’ instead of setting these huge, lofty goals (and inevitably failing at them because, let’s be honest, we’re not robots) was probably the smartest move I’ve made in a while.

So for February, I’m hoping to cement a lot of these habits in to my life, and just start sharing more of myself here and on other parts of the internet. I’ve developed a system for tracking my goals - I’ll share it later on in the month, but it consists of me assigning points to all the different tasks - when I do something, I get points I fill in. Simple, easy, fun.

Although there’s also a bunch of smaller goals, here’s what’s in store for February:

Clean myself and the house more often.
I’m alright with mess. I’m already with looking like a mess. That doesn’t mean either of these things makes me feel good in any way - I’m just capable of dealing with them both. But honestly nothing gets me out of the dumps more than picking up the house, organizing, and then hopping in the shower. The act of cleaning seems to set some really powerful energy in motion. I want more of that.

Explore a few new places in the city.
I love Montreal, and I love exploring the city. Winter tends to put a damper on my joy of going out - it’s very hard to enjoy a stroll around the city when it’s driving snow or freezing cold outside. BUT! I’m going to try and explore at least two new places in the city, be it a restaurant, a building, a new experience. I’m hoping I can find some new favourite places.

Learn, try some new things, and learn some more
Between completing my first french course, reading five books, writing daily, and trying a few new art-related things, I’m going to be learning a bunch of new things in February. I’m also hoping to apply to University again, and hopefully start getting on track with my degree again. We’ll see - I might even be able to fit some sort of dance class in there!

Make an art piece + collect my portfolio
My art is scattered all over the place, in my house, and also halfway across the country. I’m hoping to get my portfolio collected and sorted this month, partly for applying for university, and partly just so I can see all my art gathered in one place and feel good about it (and myself). I’m also hoping to work through a large-scale art piece from start to finish. And of course, document the process so I can talk about it!

Make writing and tea-drinking a daily habit
One of the most valuable things I do every year is Nanowrimo. Sitting down and making writing a daily practice is one of the greatest feelings. I have never felt more creative, more productive, and been able to see tangible growth and progress than when I’m writing a target of words every day. Couple that with a good cup of tea (and hopefully dipping in to our TOO LARGE stash of teas) and I’m hoping I’ll have two new daily habits to add to my growing list.

Take care of the body and mind
Through a daily goal of at least 5 minutes of exercise (no rules as to what it is, although I’m hoping to do some heavier exercise this month by finally signing up at the YMCA), as well as spending a bit of time every day to meditate and stretch my body, I want to take better care of my body and my mind. Because I have the chance to do that, this month, so I might as well take it!

What are your goals for the month? Do you any unique methods of keeping track of your goals, or any system you use? I also keep a page in my bullet journal tracking my goals! Let me know in the comments!

INSPIRED BY FRIDAY V.11

How was your week, everyone? Mine was good - a busy one, full of writing, writing, writing. Honestly I know that doesn't sound thrilling in any way, but it's been such a great feeling for me that sitting down each night to write has been the highlight of my week. That, and Dragon Age: Inquisition (I'm late to the boat, yes, but I also got the game for 20 bucks. So...40 bucks richer?)

Anyway, on with the links!!

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This is a really great piece on rape culture, putting in to words things I've struggled to.

As someone who hates winter, and lived her childhood smack-dab in midwestern Canada, I can agree with everything Sarah says. And I must put them all in to practice ASAP.

This post made me cry. Here's to all the single moms out there.

Morticia Addams in the bomb. Here's a great post about her.

A really fun read : inside the leagues of lady wrestlers.

The women of WWII were stone-cold badasses. Lest we forget.

Oh, be still my heart. This is a dream of a store.

What's that? You want more funny art history? Here, some sick German horses.

Stop comparing websites and start creating shit.

Small acts of kindness = wonderful things.

Oh, I love this article. Cheers to ladies reinventing themselves.

The tender art of 'midwestern nice'. Something that extends up in to Canada too.

A great article on the importance of Serena Williams.

Whoo, an interview that flips the script: 15 famous men asked if they're 'feminists'.

On portraying blackness in video games, and why we STILL need diversity in games.  

Money's been tight on my end of the world, so I needed to read this. Especially this time of year.

Well that's it for links this week! What have you been reading on the internet this week? Anything to share, please do!

BOOKS I'VE BEEN READING

I'm obsessed with books. I am never without a book on hand, and everyone always laughs that they never see me with the same book twice. I read a lot. Some of the books are really good, and some of them are really bad. Despite the fact that I tend to read mostly fantasy and historical fiction, I'm trying to read some other genres and expand what I'm reading. I post more detailled reviews on my Goodreads account. Here's what I've been reading this month:

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Uprooted
by Naomi Novik
 
This was by and large my favourite book of the month - I can’t properly describe how awesome this book is. I love me my fantasy, even though it can often be the same story over and over again. This book has one of the most terrifying enemies ever, along with grouchy wizards and magical forests. And a kickass female character, to-boot. And a glowing review on the cover from my favourite author was enough to persuade me to pick this book up. I was AMAZED by how unique the book was, while sticking true to pretty much all of the things I love about fantasy - dark mystery, badass girls, magic, legends, tradition - it had everything I wanted and MORE. Definitely my favourite read of the month - and I would highly suggest you guys all give it a read, too.

Kitchen Creamery 
by Louella Hill

I don’t usually read non-fiction books, but when I do, it’s for a good reason. Part how-to, part cookbook, part encyclopedia, every time I picked up Kitchen Creamery, I marveled (aloud) at how freakin’ COOL making yogurt, cheese and butter is. The author makes a very complex process easy, informative and completely do-able for even the most unscientific of us. C’mon, guys, you can learn how to make cheese. From mozzarella to goat cheese to freakin’ blue cheese, to all sorts of yogurts and creams and butters - it’s pretty much the coolest little book I’ve read. And it’s gorgeously designed, to boot!

A is for Arsenic 
by Kathryn Harkup

So, I have to admit, I honestly have never read an Agatha Christie book. But I was drawn to the really sharp design of this book’s cover, and when I learned that it focused on poisons used in Agatha Christie’s novels, I was sold. The author goes through a number of poisons used to kill victims in her novel, looking at how Christie herself learned about them (She was a fascinating woman!!) and also how they’re made, what they do, and every other strange but wonderful tidbit you could ever want to learn about poison. A great, fascinating, fact-filled read. 
 

The Glass sentence 
by S.E. Grove

Another great book I read this month - I’d been glancing at this book for ages before I finally picked up a copy, and loved it! Another really great fantasy novel - aimed at a younger audience, but still so good! It has a very ‘Golden Compass’ feel to it - time was broken apart in the early 1800s, and now all different areas of the earth are different times in history. Fascinating and really fun, also had a really, really compelling antagonist. If you prefer pirates and steampunk to castles and damsels, I would highly recommend (and I would also recommend even if you like castles and damsels - it’s that good!)

The Incarnations
 by Susan Barker



 So, I did not finish this book - simply because it just got too damn depressing for me. I caught on to the climax of the book the moment I picked it up, and although I found the book chilling, creepy and really interesting (Chinese history! Mysteries! Mythology and legends!) the main character just didn’t catch my attention; I wound up hating him after the first page. And once I learned where the book was going, I really wasn’t interested in finishing it. But! If you like mysteries and creepy, ancient legends, or Chinese history in any way, give the book a try - let me know what you think!

Dumplin’ 
by Julie Murphy

A cute book that I picked up to read when the reblog book club started reading it. I posted a full-length review of it on my tumblr (or at least some thoughts on it, and my feelings). While I wasn’t super impressed with the ending, Dumplin’ is a sweet, heartwarming book with a really great, fun, human protagonist (who also happens to be a happily fat teenage girl). Dumplin’ deals with a lot of issues, while smothering them in a really lovable southern charm. Definitely give the book a read - I’m loving all the hype it’s getting! Hooray for unapologetic fat girls as main characters! 

LumberJanes 
by Noelle Stevenson, Grace Ellis, Shannon Watters, Faith Erin Hicks

Oh, my love for this comic series is never ending. I picked up the first collection of the first-four comics the other day at my bookstore, and now I can’t stop reading it. It’s like if moonrise kingdom met gravity falls, for all you nerds out there. Basically it has everything - awesome girls kicking butt, magical creepy mysteries, and a hilarious girl-scout type camp. It’s funny, heartwarming, and entertaining in every way. If you haven’t started reading these comics - please, do yourself a favour and GET THEM RIGHT NOW.

A Darker Shade of Magic 
by V.E. Schwab

The third and final favourite book of the month, this book absolutely took my breath away (plus, look at that gorgeous cover). A story of parallel, magical Londons, organized by colour. A magical boy who can jump between them. A girl thief who somehow finds herself wrapped up in this. It’s got crazy magic-hungry villains, awesome fight scenes, a really heartwarming plot, and just…a great fantasy. I would highly recommend this book, but be warned, it’s the type of book that makes you want to stay in that world forever (and so far, there is no sequel or anything. So…be prepared!) 

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What have you been reading this month? Anything you think I should pick up? I'd love to hear any suggestions or thoughts on the books I read this month!

TEA TIME: FEATHER FINGERS

Today I drank an entire pot of tea, and somehow wrote this odd little piece of writing. I enjoyed it, in it's strange, unedited state, and I thought maybe you guys would too. 

After a long day of winnowing, the man had discovered that his fingers had grown feathers. They were odd little, flexible things that bent and bowed with a fair deal of pressure – but they refused to break of fray. The kind of feathers a wintering goose might wear to prepare them for the long journey – always pursuing the eternal summer. They felt strange – yet familiar, truly – like an old thing humans had long forgotten about, until suddenly it appeared again, and you knew what to do about it.

And yet he rather didn't care that there were feathers there. They felt strange in the water – an odd resistance that pulled at his palms. It changed how they felt out of the water – as if he was constantly streaming his fingers through water. Suddenly the space around him no longer felt empty. It felt full of potential and weight.

In his dreams he had dreamt of flying many times. He had dreamt of flying away many more. Somewhere the constant droll of fingers and hands weaving through water meant something other than toil from dusk to dawn. Somewhere – and it was never here. Somewhere – the word stretched out before him, filling the air with a golden taste that drew him away from his house. It drew him to the field, it pulled him. He knew he had to go.

With a sigh and a set face of determination, he stood, holding his feathered fingers in front of him. As he raised his hands to the sky, he felt the first bits of regrets slip off him like a false skin. Regrets of coming here, regrets of being forced in to this job he didn't love. Regrets of watching himself age here – the dark thought of dying here. They all fell off of him and on to the ground in front of him. He felt empty. Empty enough for the air around him to begin filling him – warm and golden and wild.

For the first time in a long time – he felt free. He glanced at his feathered fingers – their speckled colour turning translucent in the late afternoon light. Then he raised his second hand aloft, sunlight streaming through the dark feathers. With it he felt a new found confidence. A pull, a feeling, a need – something deep and primal he knew he had deep within him already – but ignored. Or perhaps it was the bird in him, he would never know. He took a deep breath and flapped.

He felt every muscle straining in his arms as the air again became a solid fixture around him. A mass, a place of buoyancy and weightlessness similar to what he felt when he was submerged in the river. The wind at his back was like a current pulling him onward. The feathered ached to feel the sky again, and suddenly he felt it deep within him, too. He ached to fly – he would fly...

Nothing. No great flight. No leap of grace or ascention to another level. No transformation or shout of joy or pain or...anything. Not a thing.

So the feathered man kicked off his shoes and started running.

NOVEMBER HOROSCOPES

 Every month I channel my inner astrologist and write out horoscopes for every sign. They aren't traditional horoscopes, but are written with extra light and all three eyes open. I've been told they're exactly what people need to hear. ♥

Aries: This month you will be fighting. Fighting yourself, fighting the world around you. Make sure you know what you’re fighting for - the warrior who knows her enemy is effective, swift and proud. Whatever you fight, know that the powers around you are giving you their strength. Know that the battle falls in your favour. Know that the experience and strength gained from these battles will be so, so worth it. Know that you are not fighting by yourself, and know that you are not fighting for nothing. You are very powerful, and you will win.

Taurus: There is little you aren’t feeling this month. Feelings seem to be hurtling towards you in all directions, left right, up down, in and out. You might feel like hiding, or running away - stand your ground. Take the feelings and embrace them. Study them. Get to know them all and chat with them. Pour them some tea and have them stay for a while. You may ask some to leave, but you may want to keep some of them too - you will learn things from all of them. If you do not want some of them (which you won’t) politely ask them to leave. You will not be alone.

Gemini: You will find yourself stretching this month. Stretching upwards, outwards, towards all the things you wish for, like a plant towards sunlight. Sometimes you may feel like you’re stretched too thin - stretching can hurt sometimes. Know that the pain is simply a growing pain. Know that with enough stretching, you will be able to reach these things you are after with ease. Know that even the tallest of trees grew from a simple stalk stretching towards the light. The greatest of dancers came from a simple, well-intentioned stretch. You will dance in the sunlight you stretch for.

Cancer: Notice the things around you this month. Notice the smallest of details and the tiniest of things. When you think you see things as small and insignificant as they are, look deeper, and you will find that even the tiniest of details is a part of a much larger and complex and beautiful system. You will need to focus on these things, for you may feel insignificant this month. Know that you, too, are a part of a much bigger, more beautiful thing. Take power from it; for you are more beautiful and powerful than you know.

Leo: You might feel a bit careful this month. Too cautious and protective and strangely unmovable this month. Do not worry - you are hardening for a reason. Know that you are drifting in to a stage of protection and peace. Know that you are building yourself in to a great mountain. Know that you are preparing for a great adventure. Know that with stillness and caution come great knowledge and experience. Enjoy the peace. Enjoy the comfort. Enjoy every moment that this stillness brings to you. You will grow stronger.

Virgo: Now is the time to sing. Now is the time to screech and whoop and yell and holler. Now is the time to be as wild and as wonderful as you know you can. Now is the time to let go and dance, now is the time to be loud and let the world hear what you’ve had on your chest for as long as you can remember. Now is the time to say what you need to say. Get the things that have been crushing you out of you, off your back and off your chest. Let them out in to the world and you can crack very mountains to rubble.

Libra: There are so many things that seem to be leaping in to your hands as if by magic right now. Be careful not to throw the great things away. But what are the great things? What are the awful things? You are the only one who can look deep in to all the things life puts in your hands and decide whether they are good or bad. You might find yourself picking up old things again for the first time in a long time. You will build a castle out of the things you choose to keep - and they will raise you to better and brighter heights. You will be more than you ever have been.

Scorpio: As the days grow darker, you will grow lighter. Focus yourself on this lightness, this joy. You may be waiting for it to go away, but try as hard as you might, the light will not go out. Do not try to snuff it out. Live in that joy, bathe in it, and use it. Spread your joy to as many people as you can. Like a match, it will light others up inside as you share it - it will not go out. You are on fire in the most wonderful and beautiful way - do your part to spread it as far and wide as you can. It will only make your light brighter.

Sagittarius: You might feel a little empty this month. You might feel a little smaller this month. You might be sad because of it - but the blank canvas does not weep for what it could be, it becomes something new, something more, something beautiful. Do not allow yourself to be defensive or hostile - allow the world around you - it’s wonders and secrets and beautiful, beautiful things to gently flow in to you. To colour you as you see fit. Allow yourself to be painted, to become a masterpiece, to become more, again. You are ready.

Capricorn: This month will blaze by you - simply let it rush over you like a waterfall. Close your eyes and breathe in a moments peace amidst the hectic world around you. You may feel like you do not have enough time, or that you cannot do what needs to be done. You may feel like you will be swept away by the rushing current that this month brings with it. Do not let yourself get swept away. Quiet your mind, close your eyes and breathe in the cool air and the rain and the cloudy days. Let the chaos around you draw you in to a deeper peace. It will be a good month.

Aquarius: You are going to find yourself running, this month. Running away or running to, or perhaps a little of both. Remember that your fears cannot hold you, no matter what forces outside and inside of you say otherwise. Think of your month as a story, take heed from great heroes of old and maybe, just maybe, you can gain a bit of insight in to things. You are most definitely going somewhere - it’s just a matter of where. No matter where ‘where’ is, it will definitely be somewhere better than before. Know that, as you run.

Pisces: Sometimes comfort is like a warm blanket wrapped tightly around you. Or perhaps it’s a cocoon. You will feel incredibly warmed this month, even as the season grows colder. Focus on family, on friends, on the home. Focus yourself and your energy inward, not outward. You will begin to see yourself and the world around you change to fit you more. You will be happy this month. Treasure the joy and the comfort, it is a rare gift of winter and seasons that has been brought your way.

NANOWRIMO WEEK TWO UPDATE

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After nourishment, shelter and companionship, stories are the things we need most in the world. —Phillip Pullman

Over the next month, I’ll be giving weekly updates as to how the process has been going for me, for my own records as well as your reading pleasure. There are few things I love reading about more than other people’s journeys as they take part in Nanowrimo - they’re always full of insights and inspiration for me.

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Did you hear that whooshing sound? It was the sound of week 2 of Nanowrimo whipping by!

As of this week, here are my stats:
Characters Introduced: 7
Plots accepted and discarded: 11 (!!)
Total breakdowns this week: 2
Words written: 30 887
Days of overwhelming inspiration: 1
Days of absolutely no inspiration: 6
Days of not meeting my target: 1
Current feelings towards writing: Crazed artist fritters around his studio muttering curses and singing songs as he cuts away at marble. There is no clear sculpture that can be seen…

Tools I’m using remain the same: Habitica, Scrivener and 8tracks. I cannot reccomend them enough.

This week has been trying, to say the least. Here’s what I’ve learned:

You’re building a habit, not a masterpiece. This doesn't have to make sense. This doesn't need to be pretty. All it needs to be is words on a page - lots and lots and lots of words. This isn't about making your magnum opus. Even the best of novels started out as a rough draft. Rougher than yours, even. Revised and re-worked after the first one had been written. Just keep writing, and believe that it will work it's way out.

Letting go of things can be hard, but freeing. Sometimes things just don't seem to work out. Sometimes you just have to cut something loose and leave it in the dust to find another person, or time, to inspire. But that can be easier said than done. I let go of all the plot and planning I had for this month. Which was hard, because this was going to be THE year I planned my novel for Nanowrimo. No such luck, I started from scratch. And the novel has been better because of it.

Inspiration is fluid and fickle. Don't pursue it, embrace it. Jump on it the moment it shines it's head, even if it's just to jot an idea down. Catch it like a little butterfly, and maybe give it a little pet to convince it to stay. It will disappear like magic if you don't (and even sometimes if you do write it down). Treat it kindly, but don't go running off of cliffs chasing it. Inspiration is not the normal state - normal is simply sitting down and getting the work done. Even if it's crap. Especially if it's crap.

Where is the line between pushing yourself and being cruel to yourself? I honestly still don't have an answer to this question. So far, it seems to me that peppering your hard work with rewards, and taking breaks, but being firm with yourself is a big line between cruelty and kindness for me. Not bursting in to tears is another. That being said, I think I need to push myself harder, still.

If something isn’t working, let it go. Collect it, write it down somewhere, and then let it go for the time being. Maybe now isn't the time to write about girls captured by fairies (my idea). Instead it's time to write about badass girls with crazy magical tattoos in a despotic kingdom (my new idea). Inspiration will come and go - don't hang on to something that's already left you. It will either come back, or reveal something better.

Scraps can always be useful later on. Do not discount the words you've written because you've changed your idea. I still feel like I'm cheating a bit by including my now-defunct story for the new one. It's almost 10 000 words added to my word count that aren't the actual book I'm writing. But everyone I talk to (including my common sense) says keep it - it counts. So I am. Because they do count for something, and maybe one day that story will get written, too.

Organisation is probably in order. Probably. Despite saying that, I have no organized my story in any way shape or form. No chapters, no settings, no real...anything. It's literally just drabbles. Right here and now, I promise to organize it the moment I complete my book (whether that's before nanowrimo, or, at the latest, December 1st).

Writing still feels so freakin’ good. So, so good. I feel so excited every single time I sit down to write at the end of the day, and even on the days where I didn't, the words flowed fairly easily - I think that's a signal that a habit is starting to form, which is SO exciting for me. It's been a hard habit to keep, this week, but I know it will pay off, and the words keep coming.

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That's it for advice and thoughts this week, folks. The second and third weeks are always the hardest for me, and I'm not looking forward to the dreaded week three. But hopefully things will work out - I'm holding on to the fact that despite my bad days, I still am LOVING writing, and loving the habit that it's giving me! Plus my plot keeps thickening like...like a delicious...soup? Soup is good.

TEA TIME: A HOLIDAY PLEDGE

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Ah, the holiday season.

The moment November first rolls around, suddenly everything is red, green and peppermint-flavoured, as if by magic. If that magical force was capitalism. Instead of going on and on about how weird and strange and wrong I find the holiday season (which I do way too frequently, and may go off in another rant later on down the line, once the Christmas season really, really starts to drive me nuts), instead I’m going to start this Tea Time off with a pledge: 



This holiday season I will be kind to retail workers.

Remember, friends, that no matter how long the lines in stores are - there are cashiers serving every single person in as quickly and timely of a fashion as they can.

Remember that the guy behind you in line is driving you nuts, now imagine how the person who has to serve him will feel.

Remember that, more often than not, no matter how much your pocketbook is shrinking from holiday shopping, most of these workers are paid the bare-minimum wage that can be paid (and in most countries, is nowhere near livable).

Remember that if you’ve had a long day at work and are tired, the people working retail are usually working eight to nine hour days on their feet all day with very few breaks in between.

Remember that retail workers, food service workers, and all the people we come face-to-face with during the holiday season are often working through important holidays, with little to no benefits. Remember that for many of them, there is no holiday season - the holiday season simply means more work and longer days.

This holiday season, please, as a fellow retail worker, I beg you,

Please be kind to retail workers. Please be kind to all the workers you come in to contact with during the holiday season - we are all working very, very hard.

Please try to spread as much holiday cheer with kindness, gratitude, patience and generosity as you can - if we all can try to cultivate this mindset, imagine how much lovelier the holidays will be!

BLOCK BUSTERS

Stuck with what to do creatively? I know the feeling - creative block, whether it’s writer’s block, art block, inspiration block, whatever block - I’ve been there. It sucks to have the wind blown out of you sails. 

Elizabeth Gilbert says that ideas are fleeting and have a life of their own - they spend their time searching for someone's door to knock on, waiting for someone to give them a home. Sometimes they just don't knock at the right time. 

I’ve got you covered. Here’s a list of a bunch of thoughts and ideas I’ve had that just haven't grabbed my interest at the right moment. Maybe one of them will inspire you to keep on creating. 

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-Mermaid jesters

-What if Frankenstein were his own doctor

-What does the wind look like?

-Are animals real? Do they have their own society? What do they say about us when we’re not around?

-Speaking of animals, how strange are pets, right? Little creatures who just bum around and sleep with us.

-What is loyalty?

-Can you buy anything you want?

-What are the intrinsic morals in humanity? Are there any?

-Make a team of encouragers - people you admire who are doing what you want to do. Make a little circle of cheer and surround yourself with their pictures.

-Collect a bunch of quotes on writing and creativity. Write them and post them where you’ll see them.

-Try to think of nothing for five minutes. Tips: Ask yourself ‘I wonder what my next thought will be’ or focus on four squares in your mind’s eye. Eliminate them one by one until you’re focusing on nothing at all.

-Whatever you’re trying to create, take 5 minutes and create utter garbage. The most garbage-y garbage you can do.

-Do it again and again until you’ve gotten it all out of your system

-Then try creating again. It’s not that bad, eh?

-‘The best food in the world is in a little Chinese buffet two blocks from my house’

-Go outside.

-What is under the earth?

-How did flowers come to evolve?

-Were there cultures and people and empires before our own? How long does human history really stretch?

-Princess hair

-Plot structures of different media - shonens vs. American cartoons. Marvel vs. Gothic novels.

-The different qualities of light.

-Different types of horoscopes and fortune telling - from engrams to Chinese astrology

-‘Yes, but what’s that?’

-Make up your own.

-The colours we can’t see

-Clothing and the stories of different fabric

-Looking in to windows

-How many stars are we really looking at?

-What the hell is up with Antarctica?

-Wounds and the body’s healing process

-Mathematics vs. Everything else.

-Lets make guys the Mary Sues and deride them instead

-‘This was before he turned in to the moon.’

-Everybody is obsessed with the same thing

That’s all I’ve got for now. Maybe something grabbed your interest. Feel free to take, alter and create with any of these strange little ideas. They’d love a new home. And if you were inspired by any of these prompts - let me know! I’d love to see what you did with them!

NANOWRIMO WEEK ONE UPDATE

"There are three rules for writing a novel. Unfortunately, nobody knows what they are."

--W. Somerset Maugham

And so wraps up the first week of Nanowrimo! Over the next month, I’ll be giving weekly updates as to how the process has been going for me, for my own records as well as your reading pleasure. There are few things I love reading about more than other people’s journeys as they take part in Nanowrimo - they’re always full of insights and inspiration for me. 

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So, as of today, my nanowrimo stats are:
Characters introduced: 5
Settings explored: 3
Words total: 12 998
Chapters written: 4
Words in ‘scraps’: 7 061
Current feelings towards writing: A seasoned veteran grins as she looks over the battlefield before charging in to the fray again excitedly.


Tools that I’ve been using religiously: Habitica, Scrivener, 8tracks (I’m keeping track of all the music I’m listening to using this playlist)

This week has been a strange-but-great week for me. Here’s what I’ve learned so far:

You can have a job and write a novel at the same time. With ease. In fact, you might find great comfort after a long ass day full of whinging customers, to sit down and type away at the computer screen, watching the words fill page after page, spending time with ideas and creativity. I was really, really worried before I started Nanowrimo this year, because this is my first year attempting the challenge while being modestly employed. I was terrified that I would come home after bad days and be too exhausted to write. But things have worked out so far, and I’m really, really happy to learn that it is possible. Whew.

Treasure your good days. On the days where the words seem to simply flow out of you, take them, run with them, tie them up and squeeze every word you possibly can out of them before they escape and leave you desperate. So far the words have just been flowing out of me, and as much as I’d like to think that this will last for the whole of Nanowrimo, I want to be prepared for the days when they just won’t come (I’m looking at you, week three. I remember you, you bastard). So I’m writing. I’m writing as hard and as fast as I can - my word count is, as of today, at over 15 000 - that’s almost 5k more words than needed to ‘win’ on November 30th. It’s a cushion for me that I’m not resting back on until I absolutely NEED to. Until then, I’m beating my word goals as many days in a row as I can.

Changing your mind is a-ok. Even necessary. Just make the decision to change as early as you can - because changing your story 4 000 words in is a far-easier feat than changing it 30 000 words in. I decided to completely scrap my story idea for this year, and return to the world of my first nanowrimo draft, with some heavy alterations. It’s a setting I just keep coming back to - and with good reason. Apparently my brain want this world to be written about, so I’m going to indulge it. That being said, I’m holding on to a lot of themes from my original idea, so all that planning was not for nothing. Once I made that change, the words haven’t seemed to stop.

Go with what you know. If you’re an almost-pantser like me (someone who tries to plan, but never quite manage to plan anything and end up making it up as you go along anyway), trusting your gut is probably one of the best choices you can make. Where there isn’t a plan or an idea, real life can be a huge inspiration. Steal people from your life, your favourite books, steal plots from movies and TV shows, sweep up atmosphere and thoughts from work in to your story. Take whatever you can find and churn it out in to your words.

Writing feels so freakin’ good. There are few things that feel as good as updating my word count every day and seeing the number get bigger and bigger. The satisfaction and accomplishment, and the feeling of having actually done something creative is intoxicating. And addicting. I know life gets in the way, but truly the best thing for anyone stuck in their lives is to create, and writing is one of the easiest ways to create. We all know how to write, and we should all be writing in whatever ways we feel best - journalling, blogging, writing a novel - or all three, in my case.

Dedicating yourself to a challenge seems to make other things fit in to place. Every day I know the first thing on my to-do list, without fail, is going to be to meet my word count. But while I’m at it, I’m also trying to do a 15-second plank a few times every day. I’m trying to remember to brush my teeth more. I’m trying to eat a fruit, take a few minutes to just focus on breathing, keep my tattoo lotion’d and looked after. I’m using the fuel writing every day is giving me and using it to develop other habits that can continue after Nanowrimo is finished - and hopefully this year I can keep the momentum up and continue writing after November is up, too.

That’s all the sage advice I can give you folks from the first week, even though I could go on about how great I feel right now. Hopefully I’ll remember this if I get blocked. Tell me how your weeks have been going! Onwards we go in to week two

INSPIRED BY FRIDAY v.10

Happy Friday, folks! How has your week been so far?

My week has been a big one - I finally bit the bullet and got my first tattoo - I'll be writing about the experience later on this week. Long story short, I'm in love. Whoops. Other than that, Christmas has officially begun in the retail world, which means I get to work a heck of a lot harder at work. Other than that, I'm just steadily updating my Nanowrimo wordcount, and have recently picked up Dragon Age: Inquisition.

Anyway, on with the links!

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Getting a head start on holiday gifts - in a proper turn-around, I'm giving a few of my loved ones some really freakin' rad undies for Christmas.

I've been listening to a lot of podcasts lately. Limetown is a standout, and this podcast really gave me a boost.

I've started paring down my to-do lists using this app, and I'm really enjoying it.

Collagers and crafters, rejoice - the British library just released a BUNCH of free-to-use vintage images.

These journalling prompts are amazing - so inspired.

I love quirky historical articles like this one.

I'm not like most girls - I laughed. A lot.

'I’m not like most girls. I don’t like drama. Unless we are talking about gritty crime dramas directed by Martin Scorsese.'

With tattoos on my mind, here's some stunning pictures of everyday people with full-body tats.

A great post on overcoming creative obstacles. 

Some yummy treats to cook in November. And some gluten free ones to try, too!

These sculptures are so stunning.

And finally, some fresh lessons on money. We could all use some.

I hope you all have a great week! Feel free to share your weekly favourites in the comments!

MY DESK SETUP

Today I thought I would share my current setup for my desk.

Every year for National Novel Writing Month I get my desk re-set for the month. This year's setup is quite different from what I did last year (which was camp out at the kitchen table with a vat of tea and a warm sweater).

This year I actually HAVE a desk to write on, and I'm super excited. I've cobbled together the best setup I can imagine - the only thing I'm missing is a really good desk lamp. But I'm hoping that will come in time.

A few tips that I've learned from NANOWRIMOs past:

Keep tea as close and as filled as you can. Replenish often. 
Whether you drink coffee, tea, or just straight-up water, keep your hydration near you at all times when you're at your desk. This year I'm drinking my favourite drink - hibiscus tea mixed with organic Guyuasa. Holy yum.

Keep hydrated. Period. 
The first thing I do when I start running out of steam is hydrate. 9 times out of 10 that's all I needed to keep going. Hydration is what keeps your brain oiled up for creativity (ew, but true). When we get dehydrated our brains begin to slow down. More water is always better than less, so keep a cup of water near.

Also, snacks. 
Halloween candy is a favourite amoung NANO veterans - a couple chocolate bars can work wonders when you're in the pits of writing. But if sugar isn't your forte, fresh fruit, a few crunchy carrot sticks, some seeds and nuts, even crackers also make great in-action snacks to keep by your desk. My favourites are grapes, pumpkin seeds and pita chips. And chocolate.

Clean it up every night 
In chef-terms, this is called mise en place. Which basically translates to 'put everything where it belongs and you won't waste time trying to find it when you need it again.' Clean up after every writing spree - scoop the wrappers and pencil shavings, put your notebook back where it belongs, take stock of what you've written. Try as hard as you can to keep things, even your thoughts, organized. You'll thank yourself later.

Have a 'thought pad' 
Oftentimes we find the best details for things as we're writing. People's names, specific habits and traits - especially during NANO, we tend to come up with important details on the fly. Have a notebook handy to write down all those names, people, traits and details so you don't forget it later.

 As you can see, despite my desk still being quite a mess, I have a spot for tea, a spot for my art supplies, a little altar of inspiring people, a place for my notepads and laptop, and a big sheet of paper that I can jot down last-minute ideas (thank you, IKEA). I'm really loving my setup so far - we'll see what it looks like halfway in.

Writers - show me your desks! What are some tips and tricks you've learned through NANOWRIMO? Anything I'm forgetting? 

And, as always, happy writing!

FIND YOUR MAGNA CARTA

There is power in what you love.

Everything that interests you has meaning. Every topic, theme, design, colour, material, TV show, genre - everything you find yourself returning to again and again holds a very special, very specific place in your life. All of these things, these ideas that we can’t seem to tear ourselves away from, or things that we love desperately, are what make up our own unique creative DNA. And if you can uncover these things, if you can find the strings connecting all of them, there comes a deeper understanding of who we are, what makes us tick, and where to focus our energy.

I’ve heard this referred to as our ‘vein of gold’, our ‘magna carta’ or manifesto, our creative DNA - whatever you call it, it’s the fabric that makes up how we create, however we create. It’s the reason we find ourselves drawn to books about religious icons in the pre-1400s, or constantly reading news stories about world politics. It’s the reason we love expressionist art, and can’t seem to ‘get’ sci-fi. It’s the reason we’re drawn to the colour yellow, and can’t stop staring at the night sky. And when we look closely at all these seemingly seperate things, we can see the underlying currents that draw our attention. Perhaps the interest in early religious icons and global politics hints at a deep-rooted interest in times of change in civilizations. Or perhaps your love of the stars and expressionist art hints at your love for the infinite.

When we begin to draw these connections, we can guide our energy, we can adjust our focus, we can align our lives with the things that we love.

-BRAINSTORM-

First thing to do is sit down with a big piece of paper, or a new word document open, and just start writing. Start listing everything that you love. Try and dig deep, be specific, and try to cover every aspect of your life; That one chord that always gives you shivers. The colour gold, especially with pink. Anything with a cute face on it. Every studio ghibli movie ever. The smell after it rains. 

Also another resource: TV Tropes. Enter any specific book, show, movie, and browse through the different tropes in it. Sometimes the basic underlying structures in what we love are the real things we love. Give it a try.  

If you find yourself stuck, go through your senses, and the things you love with each of them:

Touch: fabrics you love, feelings you love, weather/seasons

Sight: Colours you love, artists you like, photographs and art styles you love

Sound: Bands you love, instruments you like, specific sounds

Smell: since smell is the strongest sense tied to memory, think of specific memories and what you love about them.

Taste: think savory food you love, desserts you’ve had, etc

And then you can go through each type of media. Start big, then narrow it down:

Book genres you love (fantasy, biographies, picture books)

Types of TV shows (crime shows, dramas, romance)

Movies you love (comedies, animated, tragedies)

News/ Blog stories you enjoy (world news, DIYs, self-help posts)

Music you listen to (rock, indie / piano-based, vocals)

-NARROW-

Got a nice, long list? Great. Now look through the list and pay special attention to your body and your heart. Read each thing you’ve written, and notice when your heart seems to flutter out of your chest. The things that send your mind whirling in to deeper thoughts. The things that make your salivate, make your hunger, the things that light a fire within you. Highlight these things (or start a new document). Start to parse the list for repeats. 

Take only the things that make you glow inside.

As you look, you’ll probably realize that you’ve got a bunch of repeats along it, too. If you find yourself repeating a lot of things that don’t make your heart swell, try and figure out why they’re on your list so much. Is it something the people around you love? (Maybe you need to include that person, if there is a specific person’s interests that keep popping up). Is it a part of something bigger, or something smaller? Maybe you’ve written a lot of modern sci-fi titles on your list, but what you really love are books that examine human nature, or feature really cool ray guns. Try to flip and turn each thing so it catches the light differently.

Try to combine and refine all the mess in to the purest forms of what you love. 
We’re not looking for lists that say things like ‘anime, heavy metal, plants’. Dig deep, as deep as you can, to get to the real things you love. Anime might turn in to ‘animated Japanese myth’.

By the time you’re done this, you should have a list of hopefully at least 20 fire-starting things from your huge brainstorm. You should have a list that makes you feel like you’re flying, bring tears to your eyes, make you feel mega-inspired.

CELEBRATE

Take this list. Decorate it. Display it. Be inspired by it. Learn from it. 

Make a big ass image of it and put it somewhere you see it every day. Have it set on your phone. Carry it with you.

Be proud that you can understand yourself a bit more, and treasure the things you love. When we are guided by what we love, when we follow the trails our hearts send us out on, we are living our lives right (I mean, as long as your loves are legal and all that. Hurting people or things, in any way, isn’t gonna work out real well. But you know that).

I would love to see what you come up with - let me know if you make one.