INSTEAD OF HATING YOUR BODY...

Feeling bad about yourself? Here are over 100 ways to get out of that funk and start practicing some self-love. Take a deep breath and try any or all of these!

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Drink a glass of water ♥ Breathe in and out slowly, ten times ♥ Break in to some Warrior poses ♥ Do a little bit of ballet warm-ups ♥ Let out a big, walloping laugh ♥ Watch a TED talk ♥ Write out 10 things you would like to learn ♥ Think about one of the things you want to learn ♥ Read a book ♥ Call a good friend ♥ Call your mom ♥ Write a note to a stranger ♥ Look at the sky ♥ Go for a walk ♥ Look for hidden treasure on your walk ♥ Learn some mudras and do them ♥ Listen to some upbeat music ♥ Write a positive comment on someone’s blog or social media ♥ Braid your hair ♥ Curl up in a blanket and relax ♥ Say an affirmation or two ♥ Collect some positive quotes ♥ And read them whenever you need a boost ♥ Read a random wikipedia article ♥ Write 100 words stream-of-conciousnes ♥ Learn to lucid dream ♥ Take a picture of something that makes you happy ♥ Doodle on something ♥ Pull 5 of the most strange faces you can ♥ Paint your toenails ♥ Read some manga ♥ Shake your booty ♥ Write out 25 things you’re grateful for ♥ Sing something ♥ Take note of your surroundings. Try to be completely present in the moment ♥ Brew a cup of tea or coffee ♥ Nibble on something ♥ Learn what you’re life’s purpose is ♥ Play a fun game ♥ Have your fortune told ♥ Help make someone’s dream come true ♥ Give people in need rice ♥ Stretch it out ♥ Make something beautiful ♥ Take a long bath ♥ Bake a cake ♥ Eat a cake ♥ Turn off the TV ♥ Snuggle in to your favourite outfit ♥  Light a candle ♥ Wash your face ♥ Learn 10 words in a new language ♥ Make a collage ♥ Take some pictures ♥ Go to a store and pick out paint chips ♥ Make some paper stars ♥ Soak up some sunlight ♥ Pick some flowers ♥ Say 3 nice things about yourself ♥ Take a nap ♥ Write down ten bad thoughts, then destroy the paper ♥ Smudge ♥ Journal ♥ Tell someone else they're beautiful ♥ Write a letter ♥ Learn to do a cartwheel ♥ Learn to knit or crochet ♥ Make some button flowers ♥ Write down 10 things you're thankful for ♥ Write a letter to your body ♥ Draw a self-portrait ♥ Unplug ♥ Paint your toe nails ♥ Wear your favourite undies ♥ Watch the stars ♥ See the sun set or rise ♥ Catch raindrops or snowflakes on your tongue ♥ Play in leaves ♥ Build a blanket fort ♥ Read SARK ♥ Make some guerilla art ♥ Decorate your shoes ♥ Write a poem ♥ Make a funky t-shirt ♥ Look at your fingerprints (so cool) ♥ Try henna-ing your hair ♥ Read a kid's book ♥ Visit someone ♥ Rearrange your clothes ♥ Listen to some classical music ♥ Watch some people ♥ Read some body positive blogs ♥ Write out your feelings ♥ Try this yoga move ♥ 

TEA TIME: THE LAND OF VU

 Drinking: Ginseng Oolong

Thinking:

I pick up a stone from across the way of my Buppa and Bamma's house. The house has always been such a magical place for me, full of undiscovered mystery, and even more undiscovered territory waiting for me any time I wasn't content with the house, the front yard, the back yard. I'd grab my Buppa off of the couch, his nicotine-stained mustache that hasn't changed in at least a decade quirking in to a smile, and we'd make the journey across the road to Pinewood school. His hand was hardened velvet in my own tiny palm, I always loved to feel the creases that age had carved in to it.

I have dreams of his hands, now. Even though he’s not around anymore, I have dreams of his soft, big hands. I hold them, I trace their lines absently as I always did when I was a child. If ever someone asks me what love feels like, I will always answer, Buppa’s palms.

The school was full of mysteries I didn't quite understand - “what was that extra building for?” the special needs kids, “what is this building for?” it's a greenhouse, “where is that music coming from?” let's go see “what is he playing” bagpipes, aren't they wonderful? And then we'd stand, just outside of the doors to the cavernous gym, and listen to the bagpipes. I was transfixed by it, as music often does to me. I'm trying to recall if they wore their outfits when playing it. I don't think so – but I remember the man in full Scottish regalia, kilt, swinging tassels and all. It was beautiful as he marched up and down the gymnasium.

I scrawl some jibberish on to that stone, and pass it in to my Buppa's waiting palm. “What's it say?” I ask, feigning knowledge, as curious as can be inside. “Vu.” he says, handing the stone back to me. Suddenly it holds so much more than just igneous matter. It is a key. It is magic. A world of wonder rushes in to my head. “Vu.” I say, holding the suddenly-heavy stone in my palm. “This is the key to Vu.”

Every single thing that mattered to me, which, at that time, heavily revolved around those goofy kid-cars that you can buy, an easy bake oven, and tons of magical books, filled up this new world. I nodded, once again feigning knowledge, and turned to him, serious now, “Vu is a world for kids only. But I'd let you come visit, if you wanted.” Because I loved him, and I loved Bamma, too, and my mom, and I knew that they could all come visit me when I went there. I’d use it as a bribe in the schoolyard, my little heavy stone, the gatekeeper to a world all of my own

“If you give me your fruit snacks, I’ll let you come visit me in Vu.”

“I’d let you go to Vu with me. Because I like you.”

“I like you too.”

But try as hard as I could, I could never get to Vu. I got close, a couple of times, but it never happened. To this day, Vu is still a part of my mind – a separate world that, I realize, I can only belong to, that I just can’t quite reach. But I don’t have to. Perhaps it is some of my untapped psychic potential leaking through, or maybe it's simply me holding on to something from my childhood I hold dearly. It has shifted, and oftentimes I don't call it by that same name, but I still hold, within a large part of my mind, a world all my own. It is magical.

“It's a key to Vu.” I say to mom, handing it to her, all puffed up and proud. I can be like that with mom. She's a goof, and she knows I am too. There’s a party happening – I can't remember why. Maybe Christmas, maybe not. We used to have celebrations in our old house. The whole family would come. It was wonderful. I loved the attention, the conversation, helping mom. “Only kids are allowed there.” I add, looking around at all the adults smiling at me.

Of course, mom pipes up. “Oh.” she says, matching my false pride of her own. “Well...” she runs in to the kitchen and picks up a spatula “This is a key to Cockadoodle.” she finishes, brandishing the red spoon eagerly. “And kids aren't allowed. We go by the lake and sing to seagulls.” I immediately picture mom, standing dutily in the middle of the lake that we pass by to get to our house, a conductor's podium before her, baton in her hand, directing a symphony with the seagulls, golden sunlight drenching the area. It captivated me, and I thought of Cockadoodle every time we drove by that place for a long time, and my mom’s proud form conducting the seagulls like a master.

TEA TIME : LAUGHTER

Drinking: Queen of Tarts (my favourite tea of all time) 

Thinking:

I’m a loud laugher. 

 

I’m the kind of girl who throws her head back when she laughs. Stops what she’s doing to let out a great big crow of a laugh, followed by a staccato of smaller laughs that go on for a long, long time. If it’s something really funny, the wheezes turn in to whines, titters - I have a different laugh for different kinds of funny, but it all follows that same pattern, like a thunderclap followed by rain. The first part turns peoples heads. The second makes them roll their eyes. 
 

I think everyone’s laugh is like a fingerprint. 

 

I know people who laugh like volcanoes - an explosion that shocks it’s way through the room. I know people who whinny like horses. Scream like banshees. I know people who titter like little kids - quiet and bubbly like a brook. I also know people who don’t laugh out loud - it’s a quiet expression meant only for themselves. I know people who elbow others when they laugh - drawing them in to their laughter.

I think laughter is one of the most beautiful things - it’s such an expression of joy. I remember reading that rats and elephants both are capable of laughing. Are there things we find funny that they do, too?

I don’t understand how people have problems with laughter. 

And yet, in my life, I’ve encountered so many people who have a problem with it. I can’t begin to count the times people have shushed me when I’m laughing. The times I’ve been told to be quiet, to calm down, to relax. Is it because we don’t like seeing people laugh? We don’t like seeing people enjoying themselves? I’ve seen so many boys hooting and laughing their way down streets, through stores. Their voices booming over crowds, not drawing more than a few irritated looks.

But the moment girls laugh, we see it as a shrill lapse in control. We see it as negative. Annoying. Pointless. We give it it’s own name - giggling. Somehow a giggle is far more condescending than a laugh. At once more ladylike and less ladylike in one swoop. It’s less serious. It’s less powerful. It’s less important. It’s not as good as a laugh. 
 

Men laugh. Girls giggle. 

 

Funny, how once again, the word applied to females is again less-than. Surprising? Not at all.

Lately I’ve started watching a lot more media directed and created by women. I’ve been watching Amy Poehler, Chelsea Handler, Broad City. They’re funny. They’re smart. They’re masters of the ‘art’ of comedy just as much as any of the ‘big (male) names’ of comedy (which I find, ironically, funny. Comedy is always, when compared to other performance art forms, less-than. Before all these big dudes became comedy ‘heroes’, comedy was restricted to basements and the backs of newspapers - but that’s another thing for another time). And whenever I try to discuss these hilarious women with people, I’m met with straight faces. “I don’t find women as funny. They just aren’t.”

Sorry, ladies. Get your bitchface ready for permanent application and get ready for the newsflash of the century. We are not funny. Funny things aren’t in our vocabulary, and even if we do find something funny, it’s not real funny. How the hell can our small baby-brains grasp such an advanced concept as humor? Silly females.No, wait, not silly females. Right? Because we’re not funny. Right. Let’s go back to making sandwiches and babies, silently. 
 

Can you taste the sarcasm? Oh shit. That’s kind of funny, isn’t it?! 

 

I have nothing to say to this. Because, I just laugh. I throw my head back and let out my laugh in a golden forte (that’s loud, for all you non-musicians). I’ll be over here, watching smart ladies make smart jokes, and smart ladies make fart jokes, and smart ladies just being funny. Laughing my ass off.

And somehow, still, making a feminist statement. 

Laughter is the best medicine, right? 
Right?

QUARTERLY GOALS AUTUMN 2015

(Am I the only one who thinks these doors look like the entrance to a Dwemmer ruin?)

Every few months, I make a list of various goals and things that I want to get done. It keeps me on track, and as a self-professed list-junkie, there is no better feeling than checking the things I've done off. For fall this year, I have a LOT of goals - so I've broken them down in to a few different categories. Hopefully by the time the year is up, I'll be able to look back and feel like I've had one hell of a fall!

 HOME & HEARTH

♥ Make homemade Eggs Benne ♥ Make cheese ♥ Buy a himilayan salt lamp ♥ Get blankets & Art supplies from home ♥ Send a package to Mom ♥ Make soup and/or chili ♥ Buy frames for all our art ♥ Make an altar for Guides & Goddesses ♥ Use the Crock Pot x5 ♥ Get a haircut ♥ Collect and Display all my books ♥ Make a care package for Bamma ♥

EXPERIENCES 

 ♥ See Kate Beaton ♥ Build a blanket fort ♥ Go to a cat cafe ♥ Launch my Blog ♥ Get my tattoo ♥ Collect 13 leaves ♥ Celebrate Hallowe’en ♥ Go to Marche aux Puces ♥ Climb the mountain and see the leaves ♥ Photograph 100 Happy Things ♥ 

CREATIVITY

♥ Make a new art idea list ♥ Photograph your day ♥ photograph your week ♥ Record a podcast / letsplay ♥ Finish cross stitch ♥ Make three to-colour drawings ♥ Make a cozy blanket ♥ Make 6 pieces of mail art ♥ Make an art journal ♥ Make a class ♥ Design a pattern ♥ Make pixel witch ♥ Make the witchy art journal ♥

MIND & BODY

Log off of facebook ♥ Read a classic ♥ Read an H.P. Lovecraft novel ♥ Have a lucid dream ♥ Read 7 books ♥ Play an analogue game x3 ♥ Complete meditation appPlay 3 Dungeons and Dragons campaigns (one with friends) ♥ Finish reading Stardust ♥ Memorize a monologue ♥

KNOWLEDGE & GENEROSITY

♥ Take a skillshare class (and share your projects) ♥ Listen to 5 podcasts ♥ Win Nanowrimo ♥ Watch 5 TED talks ♥ Apply to the YMCA ♥ Make yoga a regular practice ♥ Plan for Nanowrimo ♥ Take another skillshare class (and share project) ♥ Review Dumplin’ ♥ Try a new creative thing ♥ Do 3 projects from the art idea list ♥ Work on audition piece ♥

WELCOME BACK

Well folks, things have changed quite a bit in my world. After spending half a year preparing to move, and another year to get things back on track after moving, here I am. Things are different, things are crazy, things are great. And it's time to start sharing my life via strangers on the internet again.

Stick with me as I get used to blogging again - I promise you'll love it.

Glad to see you all again! Are you as excited as I am?